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So, I tried it once, right? This bird, total fox, had hands like a goddess. She’s kneadin’ my back, and I’m thinkin’, “Groovy, baby, this is shag-tastic!” But here’s a kicker – did ya know in ancient Japan, they called it “anma”? Meant healin’, not just sexy time! Blew my mind, that did. Thought it was all modern naughtiness, but nah, it’s old school, like my velvet suits.

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So, we’re workin’ away, and I’m tryin’ to keep my cool. But then, I hear this commotion outside. I peek out the window on the corner of High Street and Market Street, and there’s a bunch of kids playin’ footy. One of ‘em kicks the ball, and it smashes right into my van! I’m like, “Are you serious?!”

Jail for drunk driver who repeatedly rammed van into group in Clowne