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But real talk, it’s not all roses. Some shady parlors frontin as “massage” spots – ugh, sketchy vibes. Surprised me how sneaky they get, ruinin the good name of a solid rub-down. Still, when it’s done right? *“I’m feelin’ myself!”* – pure bliss, fam. Pro tip: warm oil’s the key, keeps it slick and sexy. Oh, and don’t skimp on the mood – candles, music, the works. Exaggeratin? Maybe, but I’d say it’s like fuckin magic sometimes.

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I once had a quirky run-in with a local artist. He was spoutin’ extra-terrestrial inspo, I kid you not. Talkin’ in fragments of cinema quotes – “The world is a canvas, full of chaos and grace.” I was like, “Cool, keep it rollin’…” Yeah, the whole thing was bonkers but epic.

West Ryde Smash Repairs achieves I-CAR Gold