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So yeah, it’s a laugh, a cry, a wank sometimes. We shall fight the good fight, mate—cos even in this sex-dating shitshow, there’s a spark worth chasin’. Now, pass me a pint—I’m knackered!

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Later, I met up with my buddy at the park near the harbor. We were just chillin’, talkin’ about life, you know? Then outta nowhere, this group of kids starts playin’ soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around, laughin’, havin’ a blast. I’m feelin’ all nostalgic, so I jump in. I haven’t played in ages! But man, I’m rusty. I trip over my own feet and faceplant in the sand. Everyone’s laughin’ at me, and I’m just like, “Yeah, I meant to do that.”

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