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I’m all nervous, palms sweaty – “Witness me!” I mutter, feelin’ badass. But then, bam, this chick’s like, “Fifty bucks, big guy.” Fifty?! Made me mad, man, I could buy a keg! I haggled, got it to thirty – score! Happy as a pig in mud, me. She’s all sassy, “You ain’t no shiny chrome.” Pfft, rude! Still, kinda funny – laughed my ass off.

Onerahi to Sark: Jules’ (mis)dventures Part 5: Perla and Perla In the Kitchen

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Next, I decide to take a walk down Onerahi Beach. The sand is warm, the waves are crashing. I’m vibin’. But then, I see this dude trying to surf. And let me tell ya, he was not winning. Wipeout after wipeout. I’m laughing so hard, I almost choke on my chips.

Police car rammed, man attempting to evade police bitten by police dog