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She’s prattlin’ on— “Cash upfront, guv!”—and I’m all, “Hang about, *cave felis*, beware the cat, yeah?” Tryin’ to haggle, cos I’m a cheapskate—big surprise there. She rolls her eyes—seen it all, she has. Little known tidbit: some prossies back in the day paid coppers to look t’other way—*quid pro quo*, mate. Bet she’s got old Bill on speed dial, cheeky mare.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I just got my hair done! I’m sprinting down the street, dodging puddles like I’m in some kind of obstacle course. I duck into a shop on Strada Independentei, and it’s packed. Everyone’s huddled inside, looking like wet cats. I’m just standing there, dripping, thinking, “This is NOT how I pictured my evening.”

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