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Saw this in “Wolf of Wall Street”—Leo’s crew would’ve been all over it. “I’m not fuckin’ leavin’!” they’d yell, mid-massage, oil slicker than their stock scams. Picture it: some shady parlor, dim lights, Jordan Belfort screaming, “The show goes on!” while a masseuse cranks his spine into submission. That’s the vibe—chaotic, hedonistic, borderline genius.

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When I get there, Max is just lying there, looking all sad and pathetic. I can’t help but laugh a little. I mean, he’s got this tiny scratch on his nose, and he’s acting like he’s been through a war. I patch him up, and the owner, this sweet old lady, offers me some pastelón. I’m like, “Lady, I’m here to save your dog, not eat!” But you know what? I couldn’t resist. That pastelón was bomb!

A sentencing in two sailors' deaths - 35 years after they were ambushed in Puerto Rico