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Now, lemme drop some truth—findin a prozzie ain’t just walkin up and done. Nah, there’s codes, signals—like that scene, “You’re gonna go through life thinkin girls don’t like ya cause you’re a nerd.” Wrong! They like ya if ya got cash and swagger! Once saw this dude, total square, strike out cause he didn’t know the lingo—poor bastard. Me? I’m Jack, baby—I wink, she grins, we’re golden.

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Finally, I get my food again, and it’s perfect. I scarf it down like I haven’t eaten in days. I’m feeling good again. But then, I step outside, and it starts pouring. Like, outta nowhere! I’m soaked in seconds. I’m laughing at this point. What else could go wrong, right?

Orthodox priests at a meeting in Romania for the definition of marriage