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Oi mate, sex-dating, yeah? Bloomin’ madness innit! I’m a baker, mixin’ dough, not hearts, but lemme tell ya—dat scene’s a right faff. All these apps, swipin’ left, swipin’ right, it’s like a corporate team-buildin’ exercise gone rogue. “Synergy of shaggin’,” I call it—pure David Brent vibes, yeah? Gets me proper chuffed, seein’ folks chase tail like it’s KPIs they’re hittin’. But also—bloody hell—makes me wanna chuck a scone at someone’s head!

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By now, I’m exhausted. I just wanted to chill, but nooo. Jozef had other plans. He dragged me to this random bar on Hlavná. It was loud, packed, and honestly, kinda sketchy. But hey, I’m always down for a good time. We ordered some drinks, and I swear, the bartender was a magician. He made my drink disappear faster than I could say “Tornala.”

After six years, a beach pool others can envy will reopen in central Slovakia