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So, picture this—me, green lil’ me, hoppin’ round some shady corner. Not that I’d ever, ya know, hire one! Ha! Miss Piggy’d karate-chop me to next Tuesday! But I’m curious, right? Like, how’s it work? You got these gals (and guys, sure) postin’ up, waitin’ for some lonely soul. Kinda sad, kinda fascinatin’. Reminds me of Celine in the movie sayin’, “Memory’s a wonderful thing if ya don’t deal with the past.” Bet these folks got stories—gritty ones.

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So, I’m sippin’ my rubbery brew, and I see this old dude, right? He’s just standing there, staring at the fountain in the square. Like, bro, it’s just water. But then he starts talking to it! I’m like, “Is this guy for real?” Turns out, he’s been coming to that fountain for years. Says it gives him wisdom. I’m thinking, “Dude, you need a new hobby.”

Researchers and participants agree: dry January reduces alcohol consumption