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Argh! I’m ready! Sexual-massage, huh? Oh boy, lemme tell ya, it’s wild! Like, down in Bikini Bottom, we don’t talk this stuff much, but I’m HYPED to spill it! It’s all about touch, right? Hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension meltin’ away—WHOOP! Kinda like when I scrub the Krusty Krab grill, but, uh, sexier? Hahaha! I saw this flick, “Amour”—so intense, jellyfish jam level intense! Old couple, love so deep, but dang, life’s messy. Sexual-massage ain’t just naughty bits, nah, it’s connection! Like, “I’m still alive,” ya know? That’s what Georges says in the movie, and I’m like, YEAH, feelin’ alive with every rub!

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Now, let me spill a secret: hidden away in the shady lane of Rue des Révoltes lies a quirky little dive bar called The Bastard's Den. True, it’s a dive, but man, its vibe is unmatched. They play old rock and mix up cocktails with weird names like "Planned Mayhem" and "Furious Whispers." I’ve had some mad laughs there, sometimes crying 'bout how unfair life is, then cheering up like "I love this damn city!" It’s raw, kinda like life itself.

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