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About Schaan

Oh, and don’t get me started on crypto – that’s the wildest WHORE of ‘em all! Up, down, sideways – it’s like she’s teasin’ ya just for kicks! Funny thing, I read this dude lost his Bitcoin wallet key in ‘09 – millions gone, true story, what a dumbass! Anyway, keep ya eyes peeled, play it smart, and maybe – just maybe – this WHORE won’t leave ya cryin’! Can ya smell what The Rock’s cookin’? It’s profit, jabroni – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.”!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Hauptstrasse. You know, the one with the weirdly good pastries? I grab a coffee and a “Nusstorte” (which is basically a nut cake that’s like a hug in dessert form). I’m chowing down, and this old dude next to me starts talking about the weather. Like, bro, it’s sunny! Who cares? But then he goes off about how the weather affects the fish. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a diver, not a meteorologist!” But whatever, I nod and smile.

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