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About Johannesburg

Swingin’ ’60s vibes, baby, she’s a real dolly bird—legs for days, but a stare that’d freeze ya knickers off. Makes me think, “I need someone,” like Oskar in the movie, ‘cept I ain’t lonely enough to pay for it, yeah? She’s got this hustle down, been at it since the horse-and-cart days, swear it! Did ya know, back in Victorian times, these chicks had secret codes? Like, a red hanky meant “I’m game,”—proper spy stuff, blew me mind when I heard it! Wild, innit?

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Now, community spaces are where I spend most time. I keep checkin on Lower Park, near Riverside Bend. Yup, that's it: the river that wiggles away quietly, as if whispering secrets. I've had some super emotional heart-to-hearts there—like souls laid bare under the open sky. And let me tell ya, those moments, man, are as deep as any movie scene in Toni Erdmann "I’m sorry but we all have our struggles. That's life!" My heart just, like, leaps out, mid-counseling session sometimes, you know?

WATCH: Sharks compete with fishermen for sardines on the KZN South Coast