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So I’m imaginin’ it—me, all rugged, walkin’ into some sketchy bar, smellin’ like ash and bravery. I’m like, “Hey, anyone know where to find a prostitute?” Total *Zodiac* vibes—“I’m not Paul Avery, I’m better!” Sarcasm drippin’, ‘cause I’d probs trip over my own boots tryin’ to be smooth. Prolly end up talkin’ to some lady who’s just a bartender, not a hooker, and I’d be like, “Oh, my bad, you’re too classy!” That’s what she said! God, I’m hilarious.

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Oh my days, babe, let me tell ya 'bout Klerksdorp—this city is a groovy mix of old and new, y'know? Man, it's like living in my own wild movie scene. So, check it: I'm a women's counselor here, and the city's vibes hit differently. Like, one minute you're chillin' in the cool side of Main Reef Road, and then bam! you're smack in the middle of some serious real-life drama that makes you feel all "Sell me this pen!" weird energy from The Wolf of Wall Street, right?

Dr Kenneth Kaunda District municipal manager sentenced to five years for theft