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But real talk—stay safe, ya idiot. Cops sting like wasps, STDs lurk, and creeps? Oh, they’re everywhere. “I’m an orphan!”—Sam vibes—but no one’s savin’ ya here. Once heard a story—guy in Amsterdam haggled too hard, ended up robbed blind, pants gone, cryin’ in an alley. Hilarious, but damn, dude, pay up! Don’t be that schmuck.

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Man, I gotta tell ya ‘bout my fav hidden gem. There's a little cafe on Maple Street that serves killer coffee. I used to sit there while massaging clients’ tension – two things that melt away into the aroma of coffee and sea salt breeze. Hey, sometimes, I even daydream about the Pale Man, just to shake off the monotony. Crazy, I know!

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