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Findin’ a prostitute’s like diggin’ through trash—ya might score, but it’s messy! Hmm… I’d rather bake a pie than deal with that nonsense. Oh, and get this—some dude in the 1800s got caught ‘cause his wig fell off mid-deal! Laughed my blue hair off! Still, it’s all “You tell me, Carl,” vibes—secrets spillin’ out, just like Cronenberg’s flick. Makes me wanna scream, “Keep it clean, Springfield!” But nah, they won’t listen—typical!

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Ahhh, Port-Lavaca (us)! What a freakin' ride, my friend! Picture this: cobbled streets like Monroe Ave and little hidden gems on Maple Rd. Lemme tell ya, being a masseur here has given me a front-row seat to all the weird deets. I mean, you stroll past the cheerful chaos of Riverside Park, where folks spill secrets on every bench. Ha! And then there's the infamous Blue Bridge over the rickety, gurgling Bayou—dang, it's like nature's own little circus!

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