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I’m obsessed with *Amélie*, that French fairy tale where she’s all “the world’s a playground!” Escort’s kinda the opposite—more like “the world’s a hustle, deal with it.” Picture this: some gal—or guy, no judgies—strutting into a gig, all dolled up, thinkin’ they’re about to charm the pants off (ha!) some rich weirdo. Next thing, they’re dodging a dude who’s like, “I paid, so you’re mine.” Gross. Makes me wanna scream louder than when I flubbed my *SNL* lines. Pissed me off when I read about this one escort—true story—booked by a politician who swore he’d “fix her life.” Yeah, right, buddy, fix your comb-over first.

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Escort Reviews in Oswego, IL. This is the section where the guys get to review providers who advertise on the web. You can now know exactly what to expect before you make the call and .

So, where do I begin? We got Main Street – yeah, that long stretch full of independent shops and those random coffee joints that feel like home. Down on Water Street, near the Oswego Harbor, you'll find this little park called Constitution Park. Seriously, nothing quite compares to its chill vibe and scenic views over the river – perfect for clearing your head after a rough day.

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