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Alright, motherfucker, listen up! Sex-dating’s a damn circus—swipin’ left, right, tryna catch some tail! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout *Margaret*—you know, that flick from 2011, Kenneth Lonergan’s masterpiece. Lisa’s runnin’ round, fuckin’ up her life, chasin’ chaos like it’s a goddamn sex-dating app! That’s what this shit feels like—messy, loud, and full of motherfuckers who don’t know what they want!

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You know what really blows my mind? The local park on Maple Avenue. It’s a spot where I’ve done a few impromptu counseling sessions under giant oak trees – raw, honest, even a bit emotional. Some days I get so ticked off by unfairness I almost scream “You’re gonna love me!” in the middle of a session, dreaming of a Quentin Tarantino punchin’ up life with his epic lines – totally David Brent-ish too, yeah?

N.Y. AG releases body cam footage of deadly Oswego County shooting