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Oh, and funniest thing—dude once tried hagglin’ her price with a coupon. A COUPON! She laughed him off, savage. I’m dyin’—pure comedy gold. Anyway, findin’ a prostitute? It’s raw, it’s real, it’s messy—like Gotham. You gotta own it, feel it, live it. “It’s not who you are underneath, it’s what you do that defines you.” Unleash that power, fam—go get what you want!

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Fuck, I nearly forgot—my fave local hangout is the quirky lane near the Pier. Called Dreamer’s Corner. It’s a tiny cafe run by that old mad genius, Tuck. Quirky décor, worn-out vinyls blaring obscure tunes. I sit there, scribble notes, sip strong brew. I always smirk thinking of Yi Yi lines, "The past is only a prelude." As if I’m living in an epic saga.

Old Orchard Beach voters approve rent control for mobile home parks