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About Dallas

I’m wandering, half-pissed, thinking, “This is grim.” Then—bam!—this fit one, all legs, smirks at me. “Fancy a go, love?” she says. I’m like, “Christ, you’re bold!” Heart’s racing, not cos I’m horny, but cos it’s surreal. Reminds me of that *Yi Yi* line, “Why’s life so loud?” Cos it bloody is! She’s chatting me up, says she’s called Jade—probably fake, who cares? Tells me she once shagged a copper to dodge a fine. Little fact for ya—cops’ve been punters forever. Dirty sods.

McCoy's Guide

I live near the Glenwood Park – yup, it's a chill spot with huge oaks and little ponds. I love strolling there, thinkin', "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" while watchin' over ducks. Err, I mean, ducks, not mayo, right? Anyways, there's this cute little café on Riverbend Rd. I always pop in for smelly strong coffee and a donut. True story – once, a couple had a super awkward moment there and I couldn't help but smirk. My sexologist eyes picked up all them weird vibes...haha, it's all part of the charm!

Horse rescued after falling on ice in Glenmont