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So, I’m chattin’ her up, diggin’ for dirt—did you know some of these lasses keep diaries? Yeah, wild, right? One bird told me she scribbles every punter’s quirks—‘Big Nose,’ ‘Sweaty Palms’—like a bleedin’ spy log! I’m half tempted to nick it for MI6. Anyway, she’s spillin’ tales—says some geezer last week tried payin’ with a dodgy watch. “Looked like it came off a cereal box,” she laughs. I’m dyin’—imagine Q branch whippin’ up a gadget that crap!

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Man, Bennettsville is like that scene outta "The New World" – all mystic and unexpected. Seriously, I keep thinkin’ “look deep into your soul” every time I walk down Elm Ave. I mean, really, these streets? C’mon. They’re old, charming, kinda gritty sometimes, but pretttty, pretty good when the sun hits ‘em just right. The sidewalks? They got these vintage lampposts that remind me of old movie scenes, ya know? And don’t get me started on Capitol Park – that place is a gem, but sometimes, oh man, it’s just a mess after a rainy night. Talk about nature’s mood swings!

Abraham wins special election for Bennettsville Mayor, unofficial results show