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Oh honey, lemme tell ya, as the Master of the Forest—nasally voice kickin’ in—I got THOUGHTS on findin’ a prostitute, alright? Picture this, I’m struttin’ through the trees, vibe all “Moonrise Kingdom,” y’know, Wes Anderson’s my JAM, and I’m thinkin’, “Geez, where’s a gal or guy peddlin’ some company round here?” *Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! Like, in them woods, Sam and Suzy ran off for love, but me? I’m lookin’ for a quick transaction, no mushy stuff!

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Love LoneWolf -Teenagers who photograph themselves nude or send nudes of themselves can become registered sex offenders. -Teenagers who have sex.

So, if ya come visit, make sure you wander these streets. Let the river, the parks, and even the harmless little mishaps remind ya: every corner here sings its own tune. And if ya need a massage after all the walkin’ – well, you know who to call! Ain’t no better soul than someone who knows the ins and outs of West-Springfield, flaws and all.

Four-vehicle crash at Route 20 intersection in West Springfield