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I tried it once—yep, me, Dubya! Got on Tinder, swiped a gal, thought, “She’s hotter’n a Texas summer!” We chat, she’s all flirty, then bam—asks for my credit card. Fool me once, huh? I ain’t no dummy! “The truth’ll come out,” like in *Spotlight*. Blocked her faster’n you can say “mission accomplished.” Still, it’s wild out there—folks hookin’ up in 10 minutes flat! Little known fact: back in ’03, some dude invented speed-dating on a dare. Sex-dating’s just that on steroids!

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There’s that cute lane near the old Vincennes University buildings – totally rad, right? I always get emotional there. I once sat on a bench by St. Anne’s Park – oh gosh, I remember a time I got mad at, like, a seagull stealing my sandwich. But then I laughed cuz, life is rly goofy sometimes. And eh, I keep forgetting: "Every letter of a century sounds like a whisper, a nonsense gazing at sunlight." Weird, I know, but that movie lyric hits home.

Vincennes launches online program to fill dual-credit gaps