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Sarcasm alert - oh yeah, “soulmates” on Bumble, sure. Hooked up with a guy, said “let’s delete the app” - next day, he’s back online, prick. “Happy looks good on you,” Clementine purrs - bullshit, sex-dating’s a gamble, heartbreak or herpes. Still, I’m hooked - the thrill, the chaos, the cosmic dance. What’s your take, mate? Spill it!

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Rocky-River ain't just your run-of-the-mill town. Picture this: West Vine Street buzzin' with life, shops on Oak Alley, and that little café on Maple Drive where the coffee nearly wakes you up more than a good massage from yours truly. I swear, that coffee’s killer—you gotta try it. And lemme tell ya, there's somethin’ about strollin' near Riverside Park, watchin' the Rocky River flow like it’s runnin' from some crazy caper, ya know? Its banks? They got secret spots that even I don't massage out often enough.

Hilliard Boulevard in Rocky River closed due to water main break