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Here’s a kicker – lotta folks don’t know this, but escort drivers, they train like Navy SEALs or some shit. Obstacle courses, high-speed chases, the works. Blew my mind when I heard that. Thought they just sat there lookin’ cool, but nah, they’re badass. Kinda like Maria in *White Material*, holdin’ her ground, sayin’, “I’ve got nothing left to lose!” – that’s the escort life, protectin’ what’s theirs, no matter what.

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I’ve seen some crazy stuff os here. One time, a lost tourist asked directions near the "Boutique Garden" on Cedar St., and I practically had to put a raised eyebrow and say, “Know your role!” LOL, I gotta admit, gets me mad but in a funny way. Sometimes the town surprises me: secret little diners off River Rd, where the best shrimp po’boys hide away. Haven’t many heard of ‘em, but I’m all about that insider info.

Changes coming to Ponchatoula Strawberry Fest