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I hate the apps—Bumble, Hinge, whatever. Dudes flexin’ gym pics, chicks with filters. Like, what’s real anymore? Saw this stat once—70% of matches ghost. Hilarious, right? You’re chattin’, thinkin’ “she’s into me,” then poof—gone. “The earth is my mother,” Malick’s film says. These apps? They’re a swamp. Stinky, shallow, full of catfish. Met a guy once—swore he banged 50 gals off OkCupid. Bragged like it’s a medal. I’m like, “Cool, I split logs faster.”

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Aight, now listen up—local landmarks! Benson Street is where the local diner is. You can grab the meanest fries ever, so crispy! And what about the community library on Brimley Road? Man, it's hidden, deep in a side alley. Folks go there to get lost in stories. I often sit there, eavesdropping on conversations, wink, nod... Just a little counselor's secret.

More Mysterious Drones Reported — This Time In Stamford: Police