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I got into it once, right? This chick, pro as hell, hands like a damn ninja—soft but firm, knew every spot. Made me happy as a pig in shit, but then—boom—she charged me triple! Pissed me off, man, greed’s good but not *that* good! I was like, “Lady, this ain’t Wall Street!” Still, I paid—worth it. Little-known fact: back in ancient China, emperors got these massages with jade rollers—fancy, right? Bet they quoted *The Assassin* too: “He moves like the wind.” That’s the vibe—smooth, deadly, sexy.

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When I stroll down Granby St. (yeah, that one, gr8 vibe) I see locals laughing, dat old brick facades remind me of life’s mixtape. And oh, the waterfront! The Elizabeth River shimmers like a scene from Leviathan, ya know? “The sea is an endless, tormented memory” kinda twist that makes me stop and stare—so deep, so mad philosophical.

Revealed: Norfolk Island and uninhabited Australian territories hit with Trump’s tariffs based on mislabelled shipments