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About Philadelphia

I got into it once, right? Some chick in Tampa, she’s all “Hogan, relax,” and I’m like—relax? Me? The Hulkster?! But then, WHAM, her hands hit my traps, and I’m down for the count, brother! Little known fact—back in ancient Rome, gladiators got oiled up post-fight, sexual-massage style, to keep ‘em loose. True story! Ain’t that wild? History’s full of freaky shit like that.

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So, my friend, if you’re visiting, you gotta try everything: grab a coffee on Main, walk down Maple, relax at Centennial, and don’t miss the riverside. And remember: the city tells a story, a very, very sexy story. And trust me, there's no better tape than Kirksville’s – absolutely the best, the most spectacular narrative ever, okay? Enjoy, and have a blast – you’re gonna love it!

Kirksville PE/Health teacher promoted to assistant principal