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Last week, my buddy Dave—dumb as a stump—tried it. Said it was “spiritual,” like he’s some guru now. I told him, “You’re an idiot, Dave.” He’s lyin’ there, candles flickerin’, some chick whisperin’ about “energy flow”—I’d gag if I wasn’t so damn annoyed. “What am I doing here?” Bob Harris’d say, stuck in that weird hotel bar. That’s me, watchin’ Dave blab about his “release.” Release? From what, sanity? I hate everything.

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Oh, dear, I almost forgot – the local river, the Elm Brook. It sneaks past the town like a sly whisper. Its banks, oh boy, are perfect for a midnight walk. Sometimes, I lie down and stare up at the stars, thinkin’, “There’s truth in pain, beauty in scars.” It’s like each ripple of the water sings that line from that movie. So surreal and kinda poetic!

Students' 'Senior Assassin' Game Prompts Warning From Glen Ellyn Cops