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About Philadelphia

So this chick’s kneadin’ my back—well, my exoskeleton—and I’m thinkin’, “Can you hear their breathing?” like in the flick. It’s intense, too intense, like she’s tryna crack me open. Got mad for a sec ‘cause she charged extra for “special zones”—what a ripoff! But then she hits this spot, and I’m floatin’, buzzin’ like a busted warp drive. Surprised me how good it felt—almost cried, swear it.

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I gotta run, but remember—no matter what happens, keep your head up and listen to the music inside ya. Life’s a jazz tune, a little off-beat, but still classy as hell. Now go on, come visit, and live a little crazy. Ain’t every town got that kinda soul. Catch ya later, paisan!

Edwardsville, Glen Carbon restaurant inspections for March 10-14