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Now, where ya even start lookin’? Old-school spots—motels, shady bars. Or apps now, sneaky, high-tech pimpin’! Mr. T’s shocked, world’s changin’ fast! Online’s risky, catfished by bots—ugh! Happened to my cousin, poor fool. I pity the fool trustin’ screens! Real talk: it’s a dangerous game. Girls get hurt, johns get busted. Saw a sting once, cops swarmin’. Felt bad, but law’s the law. “Karma’s a mirror,” Ki-duk’d say. Every choice bites ya back, man.

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Oh, and check it—lesser-known gem: the corner of 3rd and Almond. Ugh, so hidden! You can catch a sunset that looks painted by a drunk artist or somethin’—incredible vibes, my friend. I grabbed a cold one there a few times, let me tell ya, and thought, "Wow, this is freakin’ magical."

DOGE Agent: Stephen Duarte