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Now, check this – I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ bout *Inception*, my fave flick. “You musn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.” That’s what I say to these sex-dating hustlers! Apps like these? They’re plantin’ ideas in your head, makin’ you swipe for that perfect lay. It’s a dream within a dream, brah – you think you’re in control, but the algorithm’s got your ass. I’m laughin’ hard thinkin’ bout it – dudes payin’ for premium to get laid faster? That’s some next-level desperation tax!

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Oh man, let me tell ya bout Darlington (us) – it's freakin' wild, dude! Look, I'm a sexologist here, right? And trust me, this city’s got more secrets than you can count, dude. Respect my authoritah! So, first off, welcome to the chaotic streets of Main Street – yeah, the one that slithers past the old Darlington Theatre. That theater? Total chill spot for artsy types and hung-up lovey-dovey types.

State police charge Darlington councilwoman, her son in assault investigation