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Right, so you’re after one – where d’you start? Web’s your best mate, but it’s a minefield, yeah? Links dodgier than a photocopier jam. I’d be like, “This is my kingdom!” – channellin’ that *Pan’s Labyrinth* Pale Man vibe, all creepy and in charge. But nah, I’d muck it up – typin’ “prostitue” with 14 typos, fat fingers fumblin’. “David, you plonker!” I’d yell at meself. Happy though – freedom’s the dream, innit? No 9-to-5 grind, just vibes.

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And lemme not miss pointin’ out Meadowbrook County Park. Now that park's real chill – quiet, yet buzzin’ with life, just like them chaotic moments in the film "Children of Men" – never say never, sugar! I sometimes bring my lucky pocket massager and give nature a little rub, hehe, cause life's knotted, ain't it?

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