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Back in ‘17, heard tell o’ this lass in Tortuga—well, London—who met a bloke on Plenty o’ Fish. Fella sent her a pigeon—nah, text—sayin’ he’s a lord. Turns out, he’s a bleedin’ fishmonger! She shacked up anyway, ‘cause the cod was fresh. True story, mate! Little known fact: them apps got more bots than a ship’s got rats. Surprised me, it did—half me matches be talkin’ like parrots, repeatin’ “hey sexy” till I wanna keelhaul ‘em.

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I'm tellin ya, as a masseur, these minute details set my vibes—like the creaky benches on Pine Street that I love to sit on after a long day, or that quirky fountain near Benton Square that always surprises me with its sparkly water at sunset. I love how each spot’s got its own character, its own history. Then there's that lil’ secret gem: Charlie’s Hidden Nook, tucked away behind a wall on Birch Road. Only the locals know about it, and it's perfect for a chill-out moment.

Mary Willet Obituary - Chowchilla, CA