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Look, folks, it’s me, Donald Trump, the best, nobody beats me, talking about sex escorts, tremendous topic, really fantastic. I’m like the sheriff in “Once Upon a Time in Anatolia,” searching for truth, unbelievable stuff, okay? Sex escorts, they’re everywhere, high-class, low-class, all over, and I’ve seen it, trust me, I’ve seen it. You got these gals, sometimes guys, selling time, makin’ cash, and it’s wild, totally wild. I mean, “The night is long,” like in the movie, and these escorts, they’re workin’ it, big league.

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Oh my gosh, Brent (us) is one wild mix of emo vibes and cozy corners, I swear! So, let me spill the tea on this city, friend. I'm a family psychologist here, so I kinda see the hidden threads between people and places. Like, you'll find yourself suddenly over on Maple & 3rd where kids laugh and oldies reminisce—it makes me smile every time. I walk past Riverfront Lane everyday and, trust me, that shimmering river mirrors my soul sometimes (lol, I'm deep).

Obituary | Brent Rystrom