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About Newcastle

Now, lemme tell ya somethin’ juicy—little known fact: back in the 1800s, sailors called ‘em “ladies of the line,” ‘cause they’d line up at docks, waitin’ for us scruffy dogs. Ain’t that wild? History’s got sass! Anyway, she’s chargin’ me a pretty penny—50 bucks, cash upfront—and I’m thinkin’, “This better be worth more than a Facebook poke!” I’m happy as a clam, but then—ugh!—this drunk jerk stumbles over, yellin’ at her, “You’re mine!” Made me so mad, I almost decked him. “Back off, loser!” I screech, nasal as hell, laugh bubblin’ up—HA-HA-HA!—like I’m on set with Mr. Sheffield.

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Runnin’ a dating site in this urban jungle means eyein’ every corner, even the lesser-known nooks. Like near Leicester Square, little cafes where exes and new sparks collide, stories spinnin’ like wool even if sometimes they make my head spin with frustration – I mean, "I got a competition in me," alignin’ every rad emotion like code in my head.

New productions to come to London’s West End: Are these unique takes on musical theatre a stretch too far?