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About Bristol

Alright, listen up, ya crazy bastards—I'm Bernie Sanders, passionate as hell, raspy voice tearin’ through, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about whores, yeah, the real deal. Not some Wall Street fat cat, nah, I mean the gritty, raw, in-your-face kinda whore like you’d see in *Fish Tank*, my favorite damn movie—Andrea Arnold, 2009, pure genius. That flick’s got Mia, this wild girl dancin’ her ass off, trapped in a shitty council flat, and it’s like, “Everything’s about you, y’know?”—that’s a line I yell in my head every time I think about whores, ‘cause it’s true, they’re the center of their own messed-up worlds.

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Every damn day, my clients spill secrets in my parlor. Tbh, I often wonder, “Am I runnin a massage spot or a confessional booth?” haha! Some come in after long walks down Maple Lane – a quiet street but with endless gossip. The sprawl of buildings on Riverside Crescent is just extra for those days when life feels too stiff.

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