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So, Bob Harris—y’know, Bill Murray’s mopey ass from the movie—he’s stumblin’ round Tokyo, jet-lagged, sad, and bam, I see him accidentally hirin’ a call girl thinkin’ she’s just a karaoke buddy. “This is not karaoke!” I’d yell, snortin’ into my latte. Real talk, tho, findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ pizza—tho some say it’s close now with apps. Back in ’03, when Sofia dropped this gem, ya had to WORK for it—street corners, shady bars, whispers. Now? X posts got ads like, “Lonely? DM me, $200/hr.” Wild, right?

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Finally, I get my chips, and they’re golden and crispy. I take a bite, and it’s like heaven. I’m standing there, munching away, feeling like life’s not so bad after all. Then, I see this guy from my meeting earlier. He’s looking all stressed, and I’m like, “Hey, mate! You good?” Turns out, his laptop died too! We both laugh about it, and it’s like, “What are the odds?”

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