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Oi, listen up, you lot! Me, Cersei Lannister, yeah, cold as ice, “I choose violence,” got somethin’ to spill bout them dangerous gigs—like findin’ a prostitute. Ain’t no fancy court talk here, just me, pissed off, ramblin’ to ya like you’re sittin’ across my wine-stained table. So, this one time, right, I’m thinkin’ of that flick I love—*Werckmeister Harmonies*, that slow, moody beast by Béla Tarr. Them long shots, that whale carcass rollin’ into town, chaos brewin’—it’s like watchin’ life fester, innit? Reminds me of scourin’ the stinkin’ alleys for a working girl.

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I sit down, and this group of locals starts chatting me up. They’re hilarious! Telling jokes, sharing stories about Melksham. One guy’s going on about the best fish and chips at the chip shop on Bath Road. I’m laughing so hard, I forget about my report.

Fears proposed Melksham warehouse will cause traffic and noise