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Here’s a freaky fact—did ya know in Amsterdam’s red-light district, the girls got windows like bleedin’ shop displays? Been that way since the 1300s—sailors rollin’ in, pockets full o’ coin, lookin’ for a quickie. Blew my mind when I heard that! I was like, “Shag me sideways, that’s ancient!” Makes ya wonder—were they yellin’ “Groovy, baby!” back then too? Probly not, but I’d have taught ‘em, yeah!

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Then, during the lunch rush, this lady comes in. She orders a flat white, but she’s super picky. “Not too hot, not too cold, and make sure it’s organic!” I’m like, “Lady, it’s coffee, not a potion!” But I whip it up, and she takes a sip. Her face goes from happy to disgusted in 0.2 seconds. Turns out, I accidentally used decaf. Oops. She storms out, and I’m left standing there, feeling like a total loser.

Plans pulled for 'ugly and intrusive' 5G mast near Kenilworth homes following multiple objections