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Oh, random thought—did ya know sex-dating apps track where ya bang? Like, GPS-level freaky! Surprised me, I’m yellin’, “What, my bed’s famous now?!” Haha, so dumb! Anyway, it’s messy, fun, weird—like me tryna figure out love. “Maybe I’m not meant for this…” I mutter, scratchin’ my head. But it’s chill, buddy! Sex-dating’s a goofy ride—swipe, flirt, flop, repeat! What’s yer take? Tell me, tell me!

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After that, I head over to the local pub, The Hardwick Arms. Needed a pint after all that chaos. I sit down, and the bartender, Dave, he’s like, “You look like you’ve been through it today.” I’m like, “You have no idea, mate.” We chat about the usual stuff, footie, the weather, and how the new roundabout on Bedford Road is a nightmare. Seriously, who designed that thing?

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