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About Bristol

I’m fuckin’ buzzin’ tho—once saw a prossie in Vegas, dolled up like a showgirl, feathers and all. Thought, “Bloody hell, she’s got more style than half these wankers!” Surprised me, yeah—didn’t expect class in that game. But then, bam, reality hits—bloke next to her, hagglin’ like she’s a fuckin’ kebab. Pissed me right off! “You’re a disgrace, you soggy twat!”—that’s what I’d scream, Gordon-style.

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I rush over to his farm on the outskirts, near the old railway line. The guy’s pacing like a caged animal. “What’s going on?” I ask. He points to his field, and I swear, it looked like a scene from a horror movie. Green potatoes everywhere! I’m thinking, “Great, just what I needed today.”

Voluntary advice centre receives Community Wellbeing Fund boost