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We’re chattin’, and I’m thinkin’ *Boyhood* again—“It’s always right now,” y’know? This moment, her laugh, the cig smoke curlin’—it’s real, raw, fuckin’ alive. But then—bam!—some wanker in a beat-up Jag rolls up, yellin’ at her. Ex-pimp or some shit. I’m pissed, mate—nobody fucks with my night. I step in, all cool, “Oi, mate, piss off or I’ll rearrange ya.” He bolts, tires screechin’. She’s laughin’, says, “You’re mad, you are!” Happy as a pig in shit, me—saved the day, Bond-style.

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Finally, I get back to work. The rain’s lettin’ up, and I finish the cabinet. It’s a beauty! I’m standin’ there, admiring it, when I hear a loud crash. I turn around, and it’s a bloody tree branch! Fell right next to me. I’m like, “What’s next? A meteor?”

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