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About Leeds

Here’s a lil’ fact—did ya know some old-school hookers used code? Like, in the ‘70s, they’d flash a light twice for “I’m open.” Sneaky, right? Blows my mind how crafty they got! Anyway, findin’ one? Easy if ya got eyes. Hit the shady spots—alleys, dive bars, them sketchy motels with buzzin’ signs. Look for the strut, the vibe. But don’t be a dumbass—cops swarm like flies on shit. I pity the fool who gets nabbed!

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Then, I stroll down to the Brixworth Country Park. It’s a beautiful spot, right? Trees everywhere, birds chirpin’. I’m tryin’ to clear my head. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, kickin’ a football. And bam! The ball hits me right in the leg! I’m like, “Oi! Watch where you’re kickin’ that thing!” The kid just laughs and runs off. I mean, really? Is this how we treat our local Nose?

Assaults on police, harassment, thefts from Matalan, cyclist who rode through red light cases in court