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About Liverpool

So, I’m cruisin’ London—shaguar’s purrin’, shades on, feelin’ randy. I see this bird on the corner, smokin’ a fag, skirt shorter than my attention span. Reminds me of Mia’s mum in *Fish Tank*—all rough edges, “You’re a little shit,” she’d say. I roll up, flash a grin—groovy, baby!—and she’s like, “Wot you want, posh boy?” Made me laugh, her sass! I’m thinkin’, “This chick’s got more balls than Blofeld!”

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But then, just as I’m about to celebrate, my phone buzzes. It’s my mum. “You coming for dinner?” she asks. I’m like, “Mum, I’m busy making bank!” But she’s persistent. “You promised!” Ugh, fine! I’ll swing by after work.

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