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Anyways, I’m bouncin’ through town, lookin’ for some—uh—company, right? I’m HYPED, yellin’, “I’m ready! I’m ready!” People stare, but who cares? Not me! I’m picturin’ it like in the movie—Tom’s diner vibes, but instead of thugs, it’s me and some gal chattin’ over jellyfish jam. “You’re a strange one,” she’d say, like Ed Harris in the flick, all squinty-eyed. I’d laugh, “Yup, born square and proud!”

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Anyway, I shake it off. I’m a pro, right? So, I gather my group. We stroll down the lovely Ballygate. It’s got that quaint vibe, you know? Old buildings, cute shops. I’m trying to give my spiel about the history of Beccles, but half my group is more interested in their phones than my riveting tales. Ugh!

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