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About Liverpool
Favorite part? When Candy cracked a joke—said her pimp’s breath smelled like “a landfill on fire.” I lost it—laughed ‘til I cried! Still cracks me up thinkin’ bout it. But seriously, folks—don’t go lookin’. It’s a jungle out there, and I ain’t kiddin’. Stay safe, alright? That’s ol’ Joe’s two cents!
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First off, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and it’s like 7 AM. I’m bleary-eyed, and my hair’s a total mess. I grab a quick cuppa from the kitchen, and I’m out the door. I live near the Bearsden Cross, so I’m strutting down the street, feeling all fancy. But then, bam! I trip over a bloody pothole on Drymen Road. Like, come on, Bearsden! Fix your roads! I’m not trying to break my neck before breakfast.
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