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We swears! Me, a librarian, talkin bout findin a prostittute – wild, yeah? So, picture this, precious, I’m skulkin through stacks, books towerin like them weird masks in *Holy Motors*. “We wear faces, don’t we?” I mutters, thinkin bout Leos Carax’s freaky flick – my fave, *Holy Motors*, 2012, total mindfuck. Anyway, findin a prossie ain’t like borrowin a book, nah. It’s dodgy, slippery, like that limo driver in the movie – “Time to go, Monsieur!” – but where?

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First call comes in around 8 AM. Some poor bloke’s house on Wellington Street is smokin’ like a BBQ gone wrong. I’m like, “Great, just what I need before breakfast.” So, I gear up, strap on my chute, and head out. Batley’s streets are a maze, man. I’m zippin’ down Bradford Road, dodging potholes like they’re landmines. Seriously, the roads here could use a bit of TLC.

Residents in Batley and Dewsbury 'are facing a terrible injustice'