Audrey Bannockburn Whore ❤️❤️

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Happy bit? When she’s got guts—stands up to some pig, spits in his eye. Reminds me o’ WALL-E fightin’ them fat humans—small, scrappy, winnin’. Love that, makes me grin all wicked. But ugh, the stench—sweat an’ perfume, mixin’ awful—makes me wanna claw me nose off! Whore’s a riddle, see? Trash an’ treasure, all mushed up. “Stupid, fat hobbit!”—ya miss it, but I don’t! She’s WALL-E with no heart—just wheels, rollin’ over yer dreams. Ha! What a mess, eh, preciousss?

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So, I’m trying to get them to calm down, right? But then, outta nowhere, the youngest, little Jamie, decides he wants to play hide and seek. I’m like, “Sure, why not?” But then he hides in the cupboard under the stairs. I’m thinking, “Great, now I gotta find him.” I’m searching everywhere, even in the garden on Bannockburn Road. I’m calling his name, and I’m starting to panic a bit. Like, what if he’s gone forever?

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