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We’re chattin’ now—well, hagglin’. She’s all sass, tossin’ prices like grenades. I’m thinkin’, lady, I’m Dr. Evil, I don’t nickel-and-dime! Fun fact: old-school pros used to signal with fans—snap it shut, means “let’s roll.” She ain’t got no fan, just attitude. I’m diggin’ it. Streets hummin’—cars honkin’, dudes yellin’. I’m like, this is chaos, but it’s *my* chaos. Exaggeratin’ here, but feels like she’s runnin’ the whole damn city—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.”

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So, I take a breather and decide to grab a coffee from that little café on the corner of High Street. You know the one? The one with the weirdly named pastries? I order a “Cinnamon Swirl of Doom” or whatever it’s called. It’s delish, but I’m pretty sure it’s gonna kill my diet. Whatever, right?

Councillor steps down saying she has faced 'targeted harassment'