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Me, I’d suck at it. Too awkward. “Do you want me?”—straight outta the movie, right? I’d laugh, ruin the mood. But srsly, some escorts? Pros. They read people, play the game. Others? Trapped. Sad vibes. Saw this X post once—girl said she escorted to fix her violin. Broke my heart, then fixed it. Strings over sleaze, y’know?

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But I didn’t give up. I kept fishin’. And guess what? I caught a whopper! A massive pike! I was buzzin’, shoutin’ like a madman. “Look at this beauty!” I thought I was the king of the canal. But then, I slipped on the muddy bank. Down I went, fish and all! I was floppin’ around like a fish outta water.

'Muscular man' wanted by police in connection with assault